Naked Body Scanners Expose Your Hairy Genitals; Cause Cancer
According to many polls, the average sheeperson supports exposing their hairy genitals to the world, or at least to a bunch of TSA perverts, via naked body scanners that are currently at an airport near you or will be arriving soon, so that you can feel “safe.” But the Inter-Agency Committee on Radiation Safety, an international radiation safety organizaiton, has warned against exposing pregnant women and children to the scanners, due to radiation. MORE>
Everyone And Their Mother Is Linked To Al Kada These Days
Obama is back from spending your tax dollars vacationing in Hawaii, and now he’s ringing in the new year with better bullshitting skills. Just ignore his so-called mortgage modification program that saves you an average of 60 cents a month, or his stimulus package that did nothing but stimulate corporate America’s package, or his failure to tackle economic problems at home. Instead, let’s listen to the president convince us of how the penis bomber was sent by Al Kada and how the dictator of Yemen has asked America to help liberate him from Al Kada, and how Al Kada’s gonna gitcha, and how he’s dedicated to working for you.
The Dutch Will Get Strip Searching Machines For The New Year
Last we heard, Obama blamed the Detroit incident on America’s 75 billion dollar “intelligence community,” so instead of penalizing those who failed to act on the warning signs, they’re asking us to now give up our “private property” rights in exchange for more bullshit security? MORE>
Where Bush Left Off: Obama Ready To Bomb, Bomb, Bomb, Bomb, Bomb Iran?
Now that Obama got his stimulus stimulated, he’s ready to move on to bigger and better things, like bombing Iran. The propagandists over there at the teevee noose stations have been working overtime this week, to employ the same scare tactics that got us into Iraq several years ago: Iran is evil and it has nukes. We must bomb them before they bomb us. Bleh. MORE>
Governor Schwarzenegger’s Package Stimulated
Like a typical politician, Arnold Schwarzenegger destroyed California, and the idiots who voted for him will foot the bill. The state legislator approved a “stimulus” package that Arnie will sign later in order to avoid “financial armageddon.” Californians will enjoy cuts in education, service for the poor, disabled, and elderly, and, best of all, tax hikes for all. Oh, and we almost forgot to mention the goodies for his Hollywood buddies.
Fear Monger Obama Says No More America If Stimulus Not Passed
According to Obama, we’re all gonna die if his stimulus thingy doesn’t pass, pronto. Apparently, that thingy of his is supposed to prevent the current recession -- that those $600 rebate checks were supposed to prevent from occurring in the first place - from turning into a depression. Yeah, it’s complicated. MORE>
Millions To Hollywood Producers Or Face Economic Catastrophe
They say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, and that’s the truth. Like, check out how our prez Obama has inherited some fear mongering tactics from his eleventh cousin on his white side, George Bush. According to Obama and Obama only, the end of America will come before president’s day if his so-called stimulus package doesn’t pass. Just like that 160 billion “stimulus package” would have prevented a recession. MORE>
Somebody Bin Lyin’: The Bin Laden Meme Is Back – BOO!
Oh, look – another untraceable tape from that Osama Bin Laden guy. ’Member how he allegedly led his terr’rist buddies to destroy the World Trade Center, while killing some 3000 Americans, and how George Bush planned to capture him, “dead or alive,” but then ignored him, and instead focused on Saddam Hussein, because Hussein allegedly had weapons of mass destruction, that he was gonna use to kill Americans, but those weapons has yet to be discovered, and shit like that?
Hey, you silly Americans, Osama’s gonna getcha tonight. Turn on your teeeeeeeeeveeeeeeeeee, so the noose channels can remind you of how evil those Moozlems are.
Muslim And Proud: Obama Will Take Oath Using Full Name
Barack Obama will take oath using his full name, because he’s no longer a self-hating Muslim, hiding behind Christianity, out of fear of making Israel cry. In fact, America’s first Muslim president, Barack Obama, intends to follow through with his promise to reshape America’s image around the world, which includes reaching out to his fellow Muslims, who he repeatedly tossed under a bus, for political purposes.
Obama claims that it’s a “tradition” for presidents to use their Middle names during swear-ins, and that he’s not trying to make a statement, but both Jimmy Carter and Ronald Reagan broke the “tradition?” C’mon, Obama. It’s ok to be proud of who are you.
Terr’rist Says Ugly, Mean Things About Obama
Oh, well lookee here. Here’s another one of those untraceable tapes by evil terr’rist Ayman al-Zawahiri, better known as Al Qaeda numere dos. al-Zawahiri , with his mean self, either rose from the dead or crawled out his cave just to scold Barack Obama for being the ass kisser House Negro that he is. Zahawi went on and on about Obama’s proposed foreign policy, but we think his reason for scolding Obama has more to do with the fact that Obama repeatedly throws Islam under a bus just to kiss Whitey’s white ass.
